Changes Ahead

So the new baby is due in about 2 months. It seems like the time has really flown by. It didn't go this fast with Landon. It feels like I haven't done a single thing to get ready. I'm going to turn around soon and this kid is going to be here, and I won't know what to do with myself. I'm really nervous about making the transition to two kids. Right now it works well, if something is going on, Landon can go to Jerry, or to me, to give the other person time, a break, etc. With two we're both going to be doing it full-time. I can't even imagine going to the store by myself with both kids....I can't even keep up with Landon. I'm really not looking forward to making all those formula bottles again. (And no, I'm not a bad mom - I do try to breastfeed but last time Landon almost starved because I didn't make enough - and I cried my eyes out about it. Not this time - who cares as long as the kid eats??) I'm not looking forward to the sleepless nights. And I'm really not looking forward to how much harder my life is going to be.

All these negatives. What am I looking forward to? Holding Lennox in my arms. Seeing Landon kiss his little brother. Seeing our family expand and know that it's the way it was meant to be.

I'm just so danged tired. Between band and the baby I'm absolutely frazzled. I need a break, but that's not going to happen right now. I'm looking forward to my six weeks off from school.